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    The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldM to memes@lemmy.world · 4 days ago

    Another productive meeting

    lemmy.world

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    • cross-posted to:
    • iiiiiiitttttttttttt@programming.dev
    846

    Another productive meeting

    lemmy.world

    The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldM to memes@lemmy.world · 4 days ago
    message-square
    83
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    • cross-posted to:
    • iiiiiiitttttttttttt@programming.dev
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    • hakunawazo@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Pro tip: Add a background image to your video conference for privacy.

      Most unsettling part here is toilet paper positioning (if not cat owner).

      • HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        The toilet paper is loaded backwards

        • marduk@lemmy.sdf.org
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          Every time my ex would reload, she loaded it this way. Every time I found it this way, I would reverse it

          • hakunawazo@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

          • Hawke@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            I’m pretty sure this was a contributing factor in my parents divorce.

        • GFGJewbacca@midwest.social
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          Excuse me, that’s the best way to load toilet paper. The best overall, however, is a bidet. Ascend, my child.

          • Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works
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            4 days ago

            Is there a way on Lemmy to downvote and upvote at the same time?

            The first part of your statement says you should up your meds, the second part is lucid though.

            • Bgugi@lemmy.world
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              4 days ago

              Lemmy needs to distinguish itself with character-level voting. Somebody made a great post but unironically used an interrobang? Hit 'em right in the analytics.

              • Denjin@lemmings.world
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                3 days ago

                What did you just say about the interrobang‽

                • LilB0kChoy@midwest.social
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                  3 days ago

                  What’s an interrobang‽

              • Seeker of Carcosa@feddit.uk
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                3 days ago

                “Exquisite use of an interrobang, good sir. I doff my fedora to thee.”

      • just some guy@sh.itjust.works
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        4 days ago

        As a cat owner, you’ll never catch my rolls in this blasphemous position. Kitty’s getting misted if he confuses hanging TP as a toy

      • nexguy@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        So it would look like you are chest deep in a toilet. It’s the way I prefer it anyway.

        • RobotZap10000@feddit.nl
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          4 days ago

          How do you poop? A chart showing exciting new pooping postures that break the current boundaries of the pooping experience.

          • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.world
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            3 days ago

            none of these there’s not enough crying

          • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            ahaha I love how the only one getting shit everywhere is literally Drumpf. Accurate.

      • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        Cat owner… my stupid bois have found a way to empty the roll even when it’s placed like that. Nothing is safe.

      • Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org
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        if not cat owner

        Bend the cardboard roll on the inside so it becomes oval-shaped. That way it doesn’t keep unrolling if they pull on it

      • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        That would not stop a cat

      • rovingnothing29@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        The toilet paper is correctly installed

    • sprite0@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      the startup i worked for got bought by a mega corp. They taught us devs how to use some intranet forms to order things we needed like keyboards and mice. These items would get approved or rejected by the engineering manager and it was pretty straightforward.

      I put a request into the system for one of these (well one very similar, the Scorpion) thinking my boss would see the $50k request and jokingly refuse it.

      What i did not know was that any request over a certain dollar amount triggered a review, by sending the request to my bosses boss. And over ANOTHER amount it did it again. I got a talking to but it was worth it to imagine the face on some VP seeing a dev try to order a $50k chair

      • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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        3 days ago

        I bet they were laughing too before pretending to be mad

        • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.world
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          yeah, i bet they were trying to think of ways to reject it for op but approve it for themselves

    • gaterush@lemmy.world
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      A bonus is you can invite your dental hygienist over and have your teeth cleaned while you work

    • mvirts@lemmy.world
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      chokes to death on coffee

      • RedPostItNote@lemmy.world
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        Dies by monitor to face

        • Denjin@lemmings.world
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          At least he died doing what he loved. Being in a Teams call about interdepartmental efficiencies.

    • FundMECFS@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      I don’t think people realise that these setups (less exaggerated) are usually for disabled or chronically ill people unable to sit up.

      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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        So me on a Wednesday morning after a questionable amount of moonshine the night before?

        • FundMECFS@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          For some chronic illnesses. Yeah. But imagine that for life. And that’s the best you feel. It can get worse. Sometimes for long periods, you don’t know if you will get back even to the that “shitty best you feel”. And even at your best, you barely feel a fraction as good as a healthy person.

          You don’t get to feel okay your birthday, or on christmas, or when you need to do something special. You just feel ill, like a bad hangover or bad flu, in perpetuity.

          That’s the reality for a lot of severe chronic illnesses.

          • SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            That’s me today! I’m playing my favorite game: chronic illness or acute illness?

    • Drunk & Root@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      all fun and games until thr back of the monitor falls off

    • jaschen306@sh.itjust.works
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      thud oh sorry, brb… my mouse just slid off my table.

      • TheOakTree@lemm.ee
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        You would probably want a wired mouse for this one… maybe it could work like a bungee?

        • nelly_man@lemmy.world
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          Or a trackball mouse that’s secured in place.

        • jaschen306@sh.itjust.works
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          I think someone should invent a magnetic mouse

    • CtrlAltDefeat@sh.itjust.works
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      Can get a dental cleaning during meetings, awesome

      • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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        Combining “company quarterly review” with “dental cleaning”, while time efficient, is a kind of sensory combo that’s right up there with “nuts and gum”. Sounds great until you think it through a bit.

        Edit: I’ve actually done the latter by accident. 1/10 - “I don’t know what I expected.”

        • Skullgrid@lemmy.world
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          “nuts and gum”

          together at last!

      • SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        Put a big hole in that incline and your proctologist can do their thing too!

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      this does no look confortable

      • Dabundis@lemmy.world
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        If you use both hands to type the mouse would either fall off or be damgling from its cord

        • marduk@lemmy.sdf.org
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          I think it’s a trackball stuck in place but I could be wrong

          • ahornsirup@feddit.org
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            Congratulations, you made it worse.

          • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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            4 days ago

            Indeed even worse

        • hddsx@lemmy.ca
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          Use a trackball and tape the base to the desk?

          • Skua@kbin.earth
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            Tiny jet engine that thrusts uphill to counteract gravity whenever your hand isn’t on the mouse

            • Farid@startrek.website
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              4 days ago

              Electromagnets engage when you release the mouse.

    • Gates9@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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      How’s Eternal Death Slayer 3 coming along, JP?

      • otacon239@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        Do you like my music?

        You would if you had ROBOT EARS

      • Sc00ter@lemmy.zip
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        3 days ago

        Im thinking about getting robot legs. Its a risky procedure

      • FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org
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        Mmmm beeb boop please sit on my face mmmm

    • Etterra@discuss.online
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      Good luck getting up to pee.

      • shoo@lemmy.world
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        Plenty of places to hang a catheter

        • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.world
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          3 days ago

          they make these things called condom catheters

    • mydoomlessaccount@infosec.pub
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      But the desk blocks me from accessing my penis???

      • Etterra@discuss.online
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        There’s a peripheral for that.

      • Agent641@lemmy.world
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        This is a poorly designed masturbatorium

        • yesoutwater@lemm.ee
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          Nap?! This is not the place for a nap

      • musubibreakfast@lemm.ee
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        You can’t see it so you probably wouldn’t be aware of its existence

    • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Why isn’t this the standard?

      • bob_lemon@feddit.org
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        Because the mouse falls off the table the second you start typing.

        • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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          Magnetic mouse?

          • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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            If there’s one thing I like it’s resistance as I move my mouse

          • SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org
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            A trackball mouse attached to the desk is the obvious solution. Velcro would work.

        • musubibreakfast@lemm.ee
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          This is why you have the mouse grafted to the employee’s hand for optimal efficiency

        • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          Magnets, bro, how do they work? /s

        • MysteriousSophon21@lemmy.world
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          trackball mouse solves this probelm, been using one for years and it’s a game changer for weird setups like this lol

    • OutlierBlue@lemmy.ca
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      For when you really need to post on Lemmy from the dentist’s chair.

    memes@lemmy.world

    memes@lemmy.world

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