My foreman would always say “Love my job” in a happy tone after anything bad happened on a job site. The happier the tone, the worse it was
then comes the singing.
“Dear God, he’s doing H.M.S. Pintafore. We have to leave. Now!”
I know that guy
Fun fact: in America asking “how’s it going?” is just a greeting, nobody really cares
Brits ofen say “You alright?” As a substitute for “Hi.”
Pretty jarring when you’re not used to it. Id think “God, I must look like shit if they’re genuinely checking on my welfare!”
Yeah Tom Scott did one of his linguistics videos about that, he had a word for it but some questions aren’t really questions they’re basically just rituals, though rephrased a different way makes them genuine questions, and when you have major dialects of the “same” language like British and American English, we use different ones. “Are you alright?” is basically a noise of greeting in Britain and an expression of genuine concern in America, while “How are you?” is the reverse.
Chinese version 你吃了吗 or variations on that, although it’s not used so much anymore. Literally means “have you eaten”, except it doesn’t really require an answer. I imagine it came up in that video, but it’s a good one.
Literally means “have you eaten”, except it doesn’t really require an answer.
Grandmothers in every culture
When I moved to London, I remember the old lady at the laundromat addressing me as “love”
I was like: “Damn, over here my charm even works with old ladies”
As it turns out, calling somebody “love” it’s just a way of addressing people in some English regions.
I always respond thoughtfully to people I don’t like. Then I ask how they are and watch them squirm.
be advised: this will not work with the majority of neurodivergent people
It me!
Which is also probably why I give this answer. Because it irks me to some degree that we just throwaway important questions like another human’s well-being.
If someone responds without being tripped up, I sorta know they’re my kind of person.oh same haha, if someone asks me a question they’re getting the answer, i don’t care that they expected a “i’m fine”
I just realized that I contradicted myself. I said that I use this with folks I don’t like, and then that when I use it, if someone responds well, that I know they’re my kinda people.
I don’t exclusively use it with folks I don’t like! I also throw it out playfully. It’s validating when folks respond in-kind.
Won’t stop us from having a conversation or even just bitching about something that is randomly bothering us.
depends on the part of America. in some rural areas no but in the city absolutely
It’s really like that everywhere, in my experience.
It’s at most small talk, not a license to dive into one’s life story.
Defcon 5
I never know if they’re meaning that it’s not that bad, or if they actually mean defcon 1.
Because with defcon, the lower the number, the worse the situation.
Defcon NaN
“The situation is so bad, it can’t even be defined!”
“Hanging in there”
Look, I’m a cherry!
I feel like the one going on about defcon does not know defcon 5 is actually pretty chill
Should’ve gone the Kanye route and said defcon 3
*death con 3
In the opposite direction, when I moved to England it took me a while to get used to compliment “inflation” over there.
For example when somebody’s opinion on something is:
- “interesting”, it means it’s shit
- “ok”, means it’s bad or mediocre
- “good” and “great”, means it’s average
- “wonderful” and “amazing”, means it’s good
I once asked one of the natives how did they transmit the message that they trully believes something was a 10/10 and was explained that’s done by going into details on how something is so great.
Meanwhile Germany:
- “interesting” means it’s shit
- “it goes” means it’s bad or mediocre
- “ok” means it’s average
- “can’t complain” means it’s fairly good
- “very good” means it’s great
- “really not bad” means surprisingly great
My high-school friend group adopted “it goes” from our French class (“Comment ça va?” “Ça va!”, roughly meaning “How goes it?” “It goes!” being the common neutral greeting taught in French classes) and I slightly resent it being described negatively here.
Even better is, we casually drop the “Comment” and add the accent of a question instead, so it can go like : “Ça va?” “Ça va.”
Note that in French we can make the meaning of it vary from roughly ‘not great’ to ‘good’ just by how enthusiastic we are. It’s really only when we want to express radical emotions that we might stop using it.
(Although someone depressed might not want to express their distress and use it like the expressions in this meme…)
I’m here ain’t I = Defcon 5
So normal then?
Yeah, def on 5 is basically civilian peace times, right?
My favorite to use: “not gonna lie to you.”
My coworker once when I asked him a hard question: “Don’t make me lie to you.”
I still think of that a lot and try to work it in when someone asks me an impossible question.
when someone asks me an impossible question.
I think that response actually works for the loaded question:
“Have you stopped beating your wife?“
Implying that you… sometimes do!? :-P
When it comes to how I’m feeling? Sure, often even
Implying that if you said “i’m (fine/ok/alright/good/etc)” would be a lie.
Since it is super easy, barely an inconvenience, I am going to share this link from where my statement came from:-)
(I wish Lemmy would show preview pics of YouTube videos to let people have a glimpse of what they are in for, but hopefully my hints were enough here:-)
Oh! Thank you for the context!
(off-topic: I LOVE this cat)
I usually just go with “sheeeeeeeeeeiiiiiit”
I often respond with: “Well, I’m still kicking and screaming.” I don’t know why. I think it got used a lot when I was growing up - someone getting dragged kicking and screaming.
Folks get tripped up by that.For me, it means that despite the fight being hopeless, I’m still trying.
“Too blessed to be depressed” - they’re a Christian fundamentalist who is depressed but trying to convince themselves otherwise. You should run.
Fuckin a, man.
So far, so good.
Is another of my favorite responses to “how’s it going”
“I’m doin.” -I am not doing well and I don’t want to talk about it. But I’m also too exhausted and shattered to keep lying about my mental state for the sake of social niceties, so I’m hoping my vague, neutral statement will either convey what I’m feeling, or you’ll fill in the blank with whatever you want to hear. Just as long as you stop asking how I’m doing.
Oof
I’m German and for me, “can’t complain” means I have nothing to complain, I’m fine, nothing special
I find Germans have an easier time replying to things very frankly and without garnishment or humor. I can ask a German, “How are you?”, and he may reply with “I’m fine” and it can be taken at face value.
Americans tend to be more, I don’t know, conflict avoidant in their replies? There’s more expectation of subtext, of irony, and it’s not as typical to take “I’m fine” at face value.
“Can’t complain” is another good one. It’s often heard as, “I can’t complain [because nobody would listen anyway]”. Tone is important, as is environmental context. Blue collar workers at the site say this, yeah their day is going to shit. Your buddy says it over drinks, maybe he’s having a neutral, normal time of life, or maybe his life is going to shit and he’s giving the ironic answer to avoid diving into his real issues, while still communicating that things are not perfect.
Last week I was asked how my day was. It had been a perfectly normal, decent day, good time at work, beautiful weather, and my reply was “Life’s a peach”. I got back, “That bad, huh?” Yeah, the American habit of taking genuine expression and searching for a darkness under it can be tiring sometimes.
“On the right side of the dirt.”
The dirt is always browner over there
