A smart egg tray. It was in fact quite stupid. Mainly purchased it because of how absurd it was.
Main issues:
- it was constantly wrong about how many eggs were in the tray
- it was wrong about the eggs age.
- it took 6AA batteries that only lasted a month at best.
The egg that stays fresh for a few hundred years is kinda lame for an SCP
I dunno, does it warp probability around it so that no matter what, the egg is always fresh? How far does the effect extend? Does it affect people or just physical interactions? If people ask these questions are they under the effect and contributing to the egg’s defense and therefore continued freshness?
That really sounds absurd. Both the idea itself and the fact that they somehow screwed up the execution of such a simple thing that much.
That sounds eggceptionally stupid, eggregious even.
Wow. Nicely done.
eggcellent
Wow I thought I was the only idiot that bought it. Once they started charging for the smart features, it got unbatteried and became just a fancy box.
Hahahahaha omg that is horrible
It’s hard to top the inkjet printers I’ve owned. I still can’t believe 30 years later home printer tech is not only unimproved but worse between lower quality production and squeezing people on ink costs.
And they’re making things worse as we use less and less paper at the same time… Geniuses
Gotta protect those profit margins!
I bought an old business monochrome laser printer ten years ago. Still hasn’t needed a new toner cartridge.
I bought my parents a laser printer after years of them being incredibly frustrated by inkjets. I got them the same model as me, as well as a spare toner cartridge.
I’m still on my original toner cartridge, and I’ve had it for probably six years or so.
My parents are in their late 40’s and early 50’s. I think I might have accidentally gotten them a lifetime supply of printing.
I got my parents a laser as well and evidently I picked a shitty one because they are planning to go back to the other side 😞
Considering the volume businesses need weekly vs a private household I wonder why the very same cartridge lasts for >5 years
If you’ve owned more than 2, those are on you! 🤣
But yea, consumer printers suck.
Hey, my Brother laser printer can see my screen, you know! Apologise now!
My Lexmark laser, from 1996, just quit last summer.
Though I think I can fix it - seems a paper jam sensor is stuck.
Laser printers are way way better than the other types
Everything is better with lasers. Prove me wrong…
Sharks with laser beams on their heads?
Fricken, better.
I’ve never owned a better inkjet than the one I’ve had in the late 90s on all measures; build-quality, print quality, speed, operating noise, ink consumption, ink price, overall price, usability. Everything has got worse.
Tablets. I’ve owned 2 so far, plus fucked around with a third, fancier one that was borrowed from someone else (in case you care: a very old Samsung one, a Xiaomi model from the late 2010s, and a new-ish Apple iPad for the borrowed one).
They suck as smartphone replacements because they are too big.
They lack button inputs, so they suck as gaming devices or as computer replacements.
You can browse the web… But if you decide to type anything, the large size plus the touchscreen keyboard make for an awkward experience (in ways that it’s not on a smaller phone)
They have lit screens, so they suck as eReaders.
They’re sorta okay as like, personal screens for watching movies or whatever, but like, at that point just use a television??
They can make sorta good drawing tablets, the ones that are pen-compatible I mean… Because I mean, yeah. But the lack of a keyboard is a bummer with how I learned to draw with my other hand on Ctrl+Z, though that’s more a muscle memory issue than anything.
In general, every tablet I used felt like a less-good verion of a dozen other devices, yanno?
I use my tablet for 2 things"
Consuming media. Not sure what TV you have but mine would be a little unwieldy for taking it on travels.
Taking notes during conferences, meetings, presentations, etc. So much easier if all the notes are digital from the beginning
Wait, wait, wait. You’re telling me people leave their homes?!
In my case it’s more that I get car/airsick very easily – So when I’m out and about, I won’t be watching media on a portable screen. At most listening to music or an audio-book.
And if I’m in like. A hotel. Most of them (at least here in my country) have SmartTVs that will accept broadcasting from my phone. :P
As for note-taking, I can see the appeal but refer to my comment about typing in a Tablet being uniquely awful.
I felt like this until I bought a legit tablet, not some sub $100 tablet. it’s night and day. and it’s not even super high end, just not cheap
See, I thought it might have been my tablets being cheap things.
But messing around with that borrowed iPad (possibly a Pro, the person who lent me it was filthy rich and likes premium stuff) made me go “… This is like, a high quality laptop but worse in every way?”
The screen was drop-dead gorgeous, and it was clearly a powerful (if locked down, cuz Apple) device – but it felt like everything I tried to do on the device was in some major way a compromise to accomodate for a less-than-ideal form factor.
Same. I used to make fun of them as they’re ‘too big’ for mobile stuff but too small for computer stuff, but after getting a killer deal on a Tab S7+, it’s super useful for casual games, watching youtube/plex, drawing, and web browsing. It’s also great to use in the kitchen while cooking or doing other stuff
Absolutely. I use my tablet almost exclusively as a media device but I do feel it could be so much more. It is nice though to use it while my phone is charging overnight and not wasting battery on the phone while traveling.
One of the funniest memories from when I was travelling (around 2017) was many tourists holding up their giant tablet devices, fumbling with them to try take photos of things.
I’ve seen this at Disneyland. People walking around using a fucking tablet to record videos like people do with selfie sticks.
I had to buy a Clicker for college in a day when any number of phone apps, or even the Smart board, would have done exactly the same thing. I think it cost about $150 and the only thing it did – THE ONLY THING IT DID – was serve as an expensive and drastically crippled version of Kahoot. Abject waste of money for all parties involved.
I was coming to post the same. Those fucking clickers were so stupid and overpriced, all so my biochem professor could poll the class AND grade everyone on their results. Results to questions about material that was JUST taught in the same lesson. Good thing everyone benefits equally from lecture, right? Fuck that guy.
Anything with fucking Bluetooth. Even in 2024 getting it to connect consistently requires some kind of arcane magic
All of my Bluetooth devices work flawlessly these days. What are you using?
I went from a cheap mp3 player that I could just plug in to my computer and drag in music to an iPod which forced me to download the iTunes bloatware create an account and then took 100x longer to transfer music because of the pointless conversion each file had to undergo. This was my first and last experience with a personal Apple device. Ended up putting some old pop music onto it and giving it to my grandmother after 2 days. Uninstalled iTunes and went back to using my cheap mp3 player until I replaced it with a smartphone.
Coming in as a close second place, an all-in-one Sony Vaoi computer that cost a fortune and had shit performance. Took daily nags to Sony before they took it back and gave me a refund. I find that Sony’s hit and miss though. My favourite smartphone (Xperia Play) was Sony, and I love my Sony Bluetooth earbuds. The Sony Smartwatch was shit.
The worst piece of tech I currently own is a small server that must have hard drive issues cause it forgets everything when it restarts and I have to set it up again.
The worst piece of tech that I have ever owned in my life is a CD Cleaner I bought from GameStop back in the day. That shit was straight up a sacrificial altar. It never cleaned. Only consumed.
The worst piece of tech that I have ever owned in my life is a CD Cleaner I bought from GameStop back in the day. That shit was straight up a sacrificial altar. It never cleaned. Only consumed.
Oh shit, I remember those. They “cleaned” by using an abrasive spray to “polish” the CDs. Those things were straight-up evil.
Yes! RIP Dinocrisis. My Gauntlet: Dark Legacy survived the process though. Thing still runs today with a fucking trench etched across the bottom, it doesn’t make sense really.
GameStop
That explains it.
Funny thing is, out of all the disc “cleaners” we sold while I was at Gamestop, we got very few complaints about it. Make the discs look like they went through hell but the product worked.
Was it a cleaner or one of those “Resurfacing” things with the crank that just scratched the hell out of your discs in a circular pattern?
You needed to use the lubricant that came with it. I used mine hundreds of times with incredible results.
Oh I followed all the instructions, used the fluid & all that. Still had to track down a new copy of Street Fighter EX…
Being a teenager I tried it, but it burned.
– forgets everything
Many mother boards have a battery on them that is used in retaining state. May need to be replaced.
I checked the CMOS and ended up replacing it. I thought that was it too. Same issue.
I paid 100 bucks for this server 5 years ago, came with 4TBs. Only thing I ever did with it was run private game servers on it for my friends. Maybe I’ll try replacing it again just for laughs and poop.
HP Printer
Google Home. Bought them for $40 CAD and back then they were great. Responsive, did quick google searches, played my music all over the house.
Over the years they’ve lost functionality. Mine no longer accurately respond to voice queries and no longer complete google searches. I can still play music on them manually from my phone but when I ask it something, it responds back in French or does something completely different than what I had originally asked.
Worst part is that I ask it something, it does something different, and then when I say “hey Google stop” it just keeps going and going. Have to manually pull the plug for it to stop.
Have you tried “arrete?”
Used to love it, had too many weird promptless experiences, unplugged it and now it’s gathering dust on a shelf.
Though it was nice to say “Hey google, tell me today’s news” and get a few different news updates while making coffee.
Edit: Out of sheer curiosity, have you tried factory resetting it?
I’ve factory reset every Google home of mine multiple times over the years. Never had any effect.
Samsung appliances. Fridges. Washing machines.
Got them as part of the rental unit. They’re very new looking. But every month is some new mess up.
God I would replace them if I owned this place.
I used to be a big fan of Samsung, but over the past couple years it has become a do not buy brand for me. They keep doing anticompetitive stuff with their phones so my next phone won’t be one.
Start of 2024 my Samsung TV that wasn’t that old up and died. And my less than a year old Samsung monitor is flickering.
My watch 6 classic is my favorite smart watch I’ve ever had, but in order to get it working well on a non Samsung phone you need to go through a bunch of bullshit hassle.
I used to be a Samsung galaxy note diehard, but I stopped at the 10+. The quality just gets worse every time.
Got a Xiaomi Redmi Note and it’s basically everything I used to love about Samsung phones.
The adds and lack of support is worse though
I’ve only had ads in the themes app, which samsung also has.
The friggin ice maker on the fridge. Plus the drawers are falling apart and it’s only been 7 years.
I don’t understand fridges with ice makers. You can just make ice in the freezer without any further complex machinery.
Yeah it being broken is definitely a first world problem, hence why it has stayed broken for 5 years.
Anything that relies on mini/micro USB for charging. With enough repeated use, they eventually cause an early failure of the device.
Mini’s are fairly durable, but the spring in built into the device. With Micro, the spring is part of the cable and is cheaper to replace.
A Canon printer. Not just a simple one, but a big (wide) one with real ink tanks, about 20 years ago.
Under Linux, I could only access basic printing services with that, and this only by using a default driver not made by Canon that happened to work. So I contacted Canon to get a proper user manual to create a proper device driver for this (something I could have done without problems), and basically got the answer that they would not support this, as “open source is theft of intellectual property”. They also had some very choice words about Linux in general.
I assumed I just got an asshole on the phone, so when I attended Cebit a short time later (back then the biggest trade fair in Europe for things like that), I went to the Canon booth, explained my issue, and basically got the same reply. So I sold the Canon printer and bought an HP one. At least HP supported Linux and supplied working drivers. Sadly, they have really gone down the drain since that, so the next printer will be a different brand again…
Try brother. They’re usually quite good, though I’ve only had their laser printers.
I have a brother color laser + scanner. Love it.
I’ve had it for 8 years now, and so far it’s only on its second set of toners etc.
The only warning I give to brother printer owners is don’t leave them on. The capacitors in them aren’t the best and your printer will either not turn on without a long power off, or like mine it will turn on and off randomly all day and night.
So now I only turn it on at the wall when I need it, and unplug it after
It will probably be either a Brother Inkbenefit or an Epson Ecotank model.
Ink stinks, but I’ll condone the toner. Inkjets are so unreliable compared to lasers. Good luck, but I worry you’re stacking the deck against yourself a bit with the ink and would hate to see you lose here.
Don’t worry, I consider lasers, too.
My last Epson is a model from 2009 and still somehow works perfectly. Every Canon I’ve owned was garbage.
Well, the question for me back then was printing wide, so the selection was quite limited from the start. And laser was completely out of the equation, as anything printing wider than 21cm was industrial (size of a bus and price of a house) back then.
Buy an industrial laserprinter. Anything consumer will fail you intentionally
I grabbed an HP 3055 that my work was throwing out almost 10 years ago, along with two spare laser cartridges.
We don’t print much, but I’m still on the initial cartridge it came with.
It also has been set up in an often dusty, sometimes smokey garage, and hasn’t had an issue yet.
3055 was good.
1012 and ilk were also good, from the same era. I still have one of those running.
My LJ4+ lasted 21 years, the first part in an office setting and the latter a retirement in my home (and about 12 house moves). For its 19th I got its RAM filled. Woo! But we decided “as a household” that we didn’t need a reliable energy pig printer for a few pages a month. It made the lights flicker and the UPSes report a brownout. But it was a good printer.
Now we have an m404n and it’s everything today it needs to be.
Printers i swear all of them hate me. I love it, but just cant deal with printers.
Brother, have I got a solution for you!
Happy cake day.
With as cheap as pen plotters have gotten, I’m surprised no one has come up with a reasonably small printer looking one for normal sized paper that functions like an actual printer. the ones you can get need special plugins and vector graphics to plot. There used to be many models several decades ago, and they can still be found and modified to use normal pens, but that’s kind of a driver nightmare. I feel like we’re past the point where people need to be able to print many pages relatively quickly, and I’d rather have a printer that took a while to print but I knew that it would work every single time.
My HP laserjet 1320n is over 20 years old. Every 6-8 months I have something to print and it does it like a champ. I can even print to it from my phone. Idk the last time I put toner on it.
Brother laser printers, higher upfront cost but I don’t think I’ll ever need another. I don’t print frequently so inkjet carts dry up, toner doesn’t have that issue, toner also lasts longer, whenever I have to replace it I’m pretty sure they have 3rd party carts, and they don’t do any subscription bullshit or planned obsolescence so far that I’ve seen. Easy to set up on linux through CUPS and the official brother .rpm or .deb drivers. Cannot recommend them enough as someone who also hates all other printers.
Amazon kindle. It didnt let me plug it into my computer and upload books to use it without internet access. Everything needed sending through amazon. I should have expected this but it was so locked down and filled with ads to the point it was unusable. I attempted to jailbreak it and it bricked so i threw it away and went back to using calibre on my computer. I would really like an offline open source ebook reader.
Get a boox, runs android.
You can even install the Kindle app. But seriously, there are bunch of good ereader apps.
They unfortunately come with some proprietary Chinese apps by default
You don’t have to use those apps.
I found a paper weight at Goodwill about 2 years ago, and haven’t seen one ad, and I have an email address for it that I can mail any file format. I have not had any issues… maybe because I was a late adopter?
I’m a huge book reader, and I love it,
Nah, I had the kindle keyboard and it was great. Still is, if I don’t want to read with a backlight. My first one stopped working after at least a decade, and a couple months later I came across one in a thrift store for like 10 bucks and it still works great.
If you can get one of the early Kobo ereaders, you can flash this Libre OS on it, that would be better.
Also, those early Kobo ereaders (glo, nia, mini and some other models) can support up to 32gb sdcard, that’s a lot of books and out goes the need for cloud storage
i’ve been desperately trying to get my hands on one of those, but I live in a third country and import duties are a pain
Wow, that’s really awesome. Which Kobo devices are supported?
https://github.com/Quill-OS/quill/wiki#currently-supported-devices
the ones listed above
Thanks
I love that you’ve set that boundary there and stick with it. Admirable.
The Cuecat: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/CueCat
Came at a time when there weren’t barcodes everywhere and QR codes didn’t exist yet. Companies had to publish Cuecat specific barcodes, it was much easier to just type in the URL by the time you figured out you could use it at all.
The man who holds the patent legally changed his name after it failed so he wouldn’t be associated with it.
Went down the rabbit hole on this guy a bit. He went on to participate in the CyberNinjas audit of Arizona’s ballots after the 2020 election. He claimed to have technology that could detect whether ballots had been folded in the mail, and claimed to detect bamboo in “fraudulent Chinese ballots”.
He was such a kook, the other kooks rejected him.
I completely forgot these existed until you just mentioned it!
I think I still have one somewhere in a box of “I might need this” along with a parallel port ZIP drive and a bunch of FireWire cables.
You can cut one leg off an IC on the board and it becomes a regular barcode reader.
It also looks vaguely like a dildo, which is cool.
