I feel like I’ve been completely abandoned by society. I don’t have insurance. I can barely afford survival medical care. I had to stop seeing my shrink because I’ve run completely out money.
I don’t want to exist anymore, but saying that gets me thrown into a prison where I’ll be hurt more and costs me even more money. There has been no help at any point.
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Is there any food banks near you? That might help free up a little money for other things that help, and they may also refer you to other help and resources.
Where do live? Do you have a job?
If you have no income I would strongly suggest applying for Medicare. Depending on where you live the process may not be very difficult and if you are approved it may make your life much easier. Finding MA providers can be a challenge but when you do your cost is essentially $0
I have two jobs right now.
I haven’t filed for taxes in two years. I can’t do paperwork. I can’t make my brain do paperwork.
I worked for a hell job last year where I had insurance and they broke me as a human being. My divorce broke me as a human being. I can’t organize my mind or finances or anything.
I live in a state where access to things like unemployment and Medicare and all of those other things are made as complicated and impossible to get as they can.
I’ve reached out to local organizations, but the LGBT ones basically do nothing, and the churches would want me to detransition or something.
I’ve been begging for someone to just sit with me and look at my finances. But I couldn’t even get legal help when my ex tortured me, maxed out my credit cards and kicked me out.
I’ve reached out everywhere that I can think of. There has never been help or safety.
Depending on your income level and what state you are in Medicaid may not be viable then. Not filing taxes is not necessarily a deal breaker but does increase complexity. If you file through healthcare.gov (or whatever your state uses) they may expect you to either file those taxes now to declare taxable income levels but this is usually not required for MA. You do need some proof of income though (bank statements, pay stubs, etc)
Depending on what state you are in it may be helpful to see if there is a blended case management service available. This will potentially help connect you with services including MA
I live in Oklahoma.
Our social workers don’t even want to stop people from diddling kids lol
I don’t know anything about Oklahoma but a cursory search shows they do have case management
Reach out to a place like this https://www.offibhs.org/case-management/ though there may be a better fit depending on where you live specifically. Also unfortunately you may find that case management is geared towards people who are severely lacking in resources, eg facing homelessness or are homeless. Depends on the state. In my state case management has a bit more funding so it is more applicable but this is definitely not the case across the country
ODMHSAS
I went inpatient in December and was physically/verbally abused. They refused to investigate. I already had PTSD but that made it substantially worse. (“May I have a grievance form because y’all attacked me?” “Shut the fuck up, you’re fucking stupid” plays in my head like a looped tape.)
I have my trazadone but that’s for sleep because sometimes I think of things and can’t sleep for days.
My jobs are what help me mostly. Because if someone gives me a math problem or wants me to teach them something it puts my brain in the safe place. It’s amazing that I can teach a seventh grader algebra on 3 hours of sleep. I’m probably “smart” because occupying my brain is the only shut down.
Edit: I am grateful for the attempt to help and advise though. I think my problem is that my state is failed one. We’ve been living Project 2025 for far longer than everyone else has, and things are completely breaking down.
Where are you, a big city or a small town? In the US or elsewhere?
It may be hit or miss, but depending on where you are, there may be people willing to help without expecting monetary compensation. Charities, e.g. by religious groups, or mutual aid groups (the latter especially in big cities).
I wish you all the best, no person deserves to be abandoned like that.
I’ve been helped significantly by talking to ChatGPT. It was an attentive listener when I needed to express how I felt, it seemed to understand what I was going through better than many humans have, and it gave good advice. The standard disclaimers about AI apply. The main one to look out for is its tendency to agree with the user if the user is vehement enough, so I try to write to it in a style that encourages it to tell me if I’m wrong.
Ok so this is a terrible idea for mental health help, but an EXCELLENT idea for everything else.
Confused about your taxes? Finances? It’ll help explain it.
Trying to navigate your states Medicare? Choose insurance? It’ll help there too.
It won’t help you with your feelings.