• Awoo [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    2 months ago

    This is a great way to get everyone on android to consent to giving Google everything about their daily life including insights into their work.

    For corporate espionage they will know absolutely fucking everything.

    • SuperZutsuki [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      2 months ago

      I would love to see how awful an AI podcast trained solely on Cumtown would be. Have it generate 1000 episodes, then train an AI solely on those and do 1000 more, etc. until it releases an episode that’s just the phrase “baby jirl”.

      • Diuretic_Materialism [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        2 months ago

        ChatGPT, write and episode of the podcast Cumtown

        Sure! Here’s a fictional Cumtown-style podcast episode script. It’s written in the irreverent, offbeat, and often chaotic tone the show is known for. Cumtown is a comedy podcast with three co-hosts (Nick Mullen, Stavros Halkias, and Adam Friedland), so their voices and comedic timing will guide the flow.

        Episode Title: The Butt Plug Industrial Complex

        (Intro music fades out)

        Nick: What’s up, everybody? It’s your boy, the Sultan of Suck, Nick Mullen, here with my two lovely co-hosts, Stavros “The Greek Freak” Halkias and Adam “I Swear I’m Funny, Guys” Friedland.

        Stavros: What’s up, sluts? Hope you’re ready to get stupid.

        Adam: I hate that you guys always give me these awful nicknames.

        Nick: Yeah, well, that’s 'cause you’re awful, Adam.

        Stavros: You got your new glasses today, though, right? Lookin’ like a Whole Foods librarian over here.

        Adam: No, man, these are—these are hip! They’re like… ironic.

        Nick: Yeah, ironically ugly.

        Stavros: (laughs) How much did those cost? Bet you dropped half your paycheck so you can still not get laid.

        Adam: You’re just mad because I actually try to look good.

        Nick: Nah, Stav’s mad because he spent his entire paycheck on Uber Eats again. This guy’s single-handedly keeping the delivery industry afloat.

        Stavros: (laughing) Bro, I’m supporting small businesses, okay? I got that entrepreneurial spirit.

        Adam: If we ever have a Cumtown stock exchange, it’ll just be Stav betting on himself to eat four pizzas in one sitting.

        Nick: (laughing) The Stav Dow Jones is crashing, bro. It’s just a graph of his cholesterol going up.

        Stavros: (laughs) Oh, you motherfuckers. Let’s talk about something important though. You guys hear about this new trend with, uh, butt plugs?

        Adam: (confused) What? No, what are you talking about?

        Nick: (laughs) Here we go.

        Stavros: No, for real! There’s this new, like, underground economy of designer butt plugs. They’re like high-end ones. Custom-made, with, like, precious gems and shit. You could buy one that costs more than your rent, Adam.

        Adam: I don’t… What the fuck? Why?

        Nick: (laughs) Because, Adam, some people out there are tired of living like plebes. They want luxury even when they’re getting stuff rammed up their asses.

        Stavros: Yeah, it’s like the Rolex of anal. High status. You walk into a room with a sapphire-encrusted butt plug, people know you’re about that life.

        Adam: How would people know? You’re not showing that off.

        Nick: Speak for yourself. I bet there are freaky dinner parties where that’s, like, the thing. Just a bunch of rich tech dudes standing around, comparing notes on their fancy butt plugs.

        Stavros: It’s all about networking, baby! You think Elon Musk isn’t rolling up to a space conference with a custom-made Tesla butt plug?

        Adam: (laughing) What? No! Why would Elon Musk be—

        Nick: (cutting in) Oh, you know he is. Probably 3D printed that shit himself.

        Stavros: With Dogecoin logos on it.

        Nick: (laughs) Yeah, and it syncs up to your Neuralink so it vibrates when your stock portfolio hits a new high.

        Stavros: (laughs) You get a little bzzt when SpaceX launches another rocket.

        Adam: (sarcastically) Wow, incredible. This is the future of innovation.

        Nick: It is, man. You know, that’s what all these Silicon Valley billionaires are really about. It’s all just butt plugs and biohacking. Butt Plug 2.0.

        Stavros: Yo, honestly, we should get in on that. Cumtown-brand butt plugs. We’d make a killing.

        Adam: (laughing) What, like, with our faces on them?

        Nick: Absolutely. Yours would just be a big disappointment. You sell it as the “Friedland Experience”—you put it in and instantly feel sad and underwhelmed.

        Stavros: (laughs) Nah, Adam’s would be the one you only buy as a joke gift for someone you hate.

        Adam: I hate you guys.

        Nick: (laughing) Stav’s would be huge, obviously. Comes with a guarantee: if you can take it, you get a free sub to his OnlyFans.

        Stavros: (laughs) Dude, the Stavros Special. Comes with extra lube, and we throw in a free pizza delivery to your door afterward.

        Adam: (laughing) Why is pizza part of this?

        Stavros: It’s about the full experience, man. You stuff yourself in every way possible.

        Nick: Meanwhile, mine would be sleek, elegant. Like the iPhone of butt plugs. You could charge it with a USB-C cable, maybe even get some crypto mining going while it’s up there.

        Stavros: (laughs) Bro, you’re using your butt plug to mine Bitcoin?! That’s next level.

        Adam: This is the worst investment idea I’ve ever heard.

        Nick: That’s why you’re not rich, Adam. You’re not thinking forward enough. You’re stuck in a world of cheap Amazon Prime butt plugs. Stav and I, we’re innovating.

        Stavros: We’re disruptors, bro. We’re building an empire here. The Butt Plug Industrial Complex.

        Nick: (laughs) We could even take it public. Cumtown stock would skyrocket.

        Adam: Right up the ass of America.

        Stavros: (laughs) We’re the new American dream, baby.

        (Outro music starts playing)

        Nick: Alright, folks, that’s it for today’s episode. Make sure to subscribe to Cumtown Premium if you want the good stuff. Stav will send you a pizza, Adam will send you a sad selfie, and I’ll send you a stock tip. See you next time, losers.

        Stavros: Later, dorks.

        Adam: Bye, I guess.

        (Outro fades out)

        Let me know if you’d like any more specific jokes or scenes added!

        • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          2 months ago

          I can’t even tell if that’s worse than the real thing. Maybe there’s a niche for burning down forests and draining lakes and scorching the sky to make imitation podcaster shit.

          • Diuretic_Materialism [he/him]@hexbear.net
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            2 months ago

            There was not a single mention of how small Adam’s dick is in this. It’s clearly a crude facsimile of the real thing.

            Also:

            Alright, folks, that’s it for today’s episode. Make sure to subscribe to Cumtown Premium if you want the good stuff. Stav will send you a pizza,

            Stav would NEVER send someone one of his pizzas!

        • PaX [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
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          2 months ago

          ChatGPT composes worst, most unfunny permutation of letters possible, asked to leave reality

          Also why lemmy search so bad, was looking for something else but just find this mypillow-stare

  • WIIHAPPYFEW [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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    2 months ago

    NO ONE IS ASKING FOR THIS

    NotebookLM, the AI note-taking app Google launched last year

    who uses this except the grifters high on their own supply of boardroom presentations

    this is what we’re draining the colorado river for

  • fubarx@lemmy.ml
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    2 months ago

    Can we extend the whole ‘weird’ assessment to the tech world?

    At some point, building something just because you can should be assessed against common sense and how pointless and f’ing weird this is.

    • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      2 months ago

      It’d be nice if the environmental (and all too often, societal) damage that their “move fast and break things” ideology does was factored in to whether they fucking should be allowed to continue “moving fast and breaking things.”

  • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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    2 months ago

    I love this future where the internet is going to be dead and all human interaction replaced by bots and your meemaw who always votes for fascists will be iv hooked up to the facebook algo drip of curated deepfried slop that melts her brain and has her saying the fourteen words.

    • InevitableSwing [none/use name]@hexbear.netOP
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      2 months ago

      “Hey!”

      “Hey!”

      “You ready to talk about the 14 words to-day?”

      “The 14 words??? Hit me. As I like to say kay-know no-ledge is power!”

      “Some people don’t like 'em and say theeeeeeeere racist. Let’s dig in.”

      • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        2 months ago

        Dae Le Epic Fascist Novel Reference By Domestic Violence Enjoyer Author, Le Epic Grok, would nonjokingly churn this out at open floodgate speed. so-true

    • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      2 months ago

      So much wasted electricty and consequent environmental devastation getting cheered on by credulous bazingas that want a warehouse-sized database to approximate what it’d be like to fucking talk to a living human being if only she was ostensibly obedient and unconditionally obeyed the bazinga.

      And those same bazingas already cling to tired moviebrained cliches about the naysayers being “afraid” and “emotional” as the planet burns down to humor the fever dreams of billionaires that missed the point of cyberpunk dystopia fiction in the first place. doomer

    • InevitableSwing [none/use name]@hexbear.netOP
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      2 months ago

      I’d never listen to a typical by-the-numbers podcast. I think it’s sad that anybody does. But some people like the worst slop. It’s reality tv without the visuals. But I’m having a hard time trying to imagine anybody listening to an AI podcast. It’s not reality tv or reality. It’s an sour uncanny valley of humanish slop. If a typical podcast is junk food - an AI podcast is like the steak in “The Fly”. Why would anybody choose to consume that?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eeWNovXmdE

      • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        2 months ago

        What if empty vapid slop full of privileged dudebro pablum… but without the privileged dudebro’s direct involvement? THE FUTURE! so-true

        Why would anybody choose to consume that?

        I imagine the first treat peddler to make it into a virtual waifu format will sell like hotcakes. brrrrrrrrrrrr pathetic

          • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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            2 months ago

            Already happening.

            Yes, I actually do agree with the party line that it is wrong to bully people for being lonely or for seeking ways to offset or mitigate that loneliness, but at the same time I am really, really fucking tired of the misanthropic babbling from the waifu-cravers especially as LLM shit continues to push the rest of us into further marginalization and precarity.

  • InevitableSwing [none/use name]@hexbear.netOP
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    2 months ago

    “In the end, it’s actually a story about teamwork, making the dream work.”

    Google isn’t making things up when it says the AI hosts will “banter” with each other, either. When trying out Audio Overview for myself, I plugged in one of the sample notebooks about the invention of the lightbulb, and the results were… a bit uncanny. During the 10-minute-long overview, the two hosts had a lighthearted discussion about how Thomas Edison wasn’t the only person behind the lightbulb and that “in the end, it’s actually a story about teamwork, making the dream work.”

  • M68040 [they/them]@hexbear.net
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    2 months ago

    Driving an A.I. to mass murder by forcing it to make podcasts themed around my John Arbuckle-levels-of-bland daily life and the constant slew of trivial problems my job presents