As a woman, I really feel bad for men in our society, especially straight men. They get very little positive interaction at all. I like to compliment strangers; it usually makes my day when somebody says, “I like your hair,” or whatever, and I like to spread the joy. But I have to be cautious about giving compliments to men. A lot of them look at me weirdly if I say, “nice tie,” or “snazzy shirt.” I smile, say it, then move on so they don’t feel obligated to respond. It appears most of them aren’t used to it and don’t know how to handle it. I guess other men don’t compliment them (maybe for fear of being thought gay?) and women don’t, either (for fear of encouraging stalking or harassing behavior). It makes me sad to think of all the lonely people who get no affirmation from anybody. I’m old enough now that my days of being constantly sexually harassed are over, so I feel safe offering a few nice words.

Gay men, OTOH, totally know how to give and take a compliment.

So as a grown woman, I’m not getting why teenage girls should give any of this oxygen. Some idiot takes my head and pastes it on porn. So what? That’s more embarrassing for HIM than for me. How pathetic that these incels are so unable to have a relationship with an actual girl. Whatever, dudes. Any boy who does this should be laughed off campus. Girls need to take their power and use it collectively to shame and humiliate these guys.

I do think anyone who spreads these images should be prosecuted as a child pornographer and listed as a sex offender. Make an example out of a few and the rest won’t dare to share it outside their sick incels club.

You echo my experience to a T. Sometimes people assume I’m a man to hilarious effect, but most of the time it’s a non-issue.