… You right mate? Smelling toast at all?

Yup, fuck the Salvos.

Preschool Memes need to die, you can say ‘dick’ on the internet for fuck’s sake!

I hope OP didn’t skimp on the milk :)

Triumph! Haven’t seen that dog in ages!

Shit Parking.

If you’re driving a 2 ton metal box and can’t have the spatial awareness to fit it into a large rectangle, you shouldn’t be on the road.

Same, no limit. Not American.

“Hey, alien planet we’ve never been on before. Let’s take our helmets off.”

“Hey our map guy got LOST inside an underground tunnel and tried to pet an alien snake and now he’s infected.”

“This medical machine is configured for men. Caesarian mode is on the left.”

I call the movie Fuckwits In Space for these and many more reasons.

An Audi TT.

FUCK Audi. Never again. Nothing but problems with that heap of shit, and repairs cost more than I paid for the car.

1980: in the future, we’ll have flying cars! 2024: Stop dipping your balls in soy sauce you fucking idiots

Tesla: “hay guys we invented the bus, but cyber”

I’m not a fan of her music, but I can respect the person.

She’s great, and it’s not the first time she’s done something like this, either.

I will never forgive the Apple rep who came into our retail store and loaded up the store Homepod with A PLAYLIST OF SIXTY THREE DIFFERENT FUCKING RENDITIONS OF THAT CUNTING SONG and then locked it out so we couldn’t change it back to normal human music. Said it was his favourite song.

I made a complaint and never saw him again. I’ve never seen an entire store’s staff hate life more.

28 square kilometres and the dog was only partially burned? That guy shouldn’t play with fire.

“I’ve always wanted to do that!”

Wands up.

That’s be like sticking a burnt sausage into a food disposal and would probably sound similar, too.

“So, as I was trying to say…”

schlorp

iRacing in the streets, Mario Kart in the sheets